but that is what describes today, so Hump Day it is. Yesterday another trip to the gym, wonderful to do but wearing on this driver in the summer heat and glare. While KidThree was working out, I went to the hometown (five miles or so down the road) to buy ice cream from our favorite ice cream parlor: pistachio for KidThree, chocolate mint for KidOne, blueberry cheesecake for me, and mocha fudge for the freezer. I was all prepared with the ice chest and a bag of ice, and the ice cream made it home okay. A little too soft to eat right when we got here, but fine after a bit in the freezer. We do that several times a year--bring back our ice cream with us. In the winter, all I have to do is wrap the containers in several towels but in the summer it does need the ice chest.
On the way home, we stopped at Straw Hat Pizza and got a large pepperoni, extra toasted, to go. I do so love Straw Hat Pizza, and there isn't one within an easy traveling distance of home. When I was a kid, I worked at a gift shop in the hometown. Three shops down from us in the little strip mall, right on the end, was a Straw Hat Pizza. I used to call and order a mini-pizza for lunch, then walk around the back of the shop to the take-out window to get it. I do so love Straw Hat Pizza. Yes, it is greasy, but such tasty grease! And I love the floury, almost cracker-like crispness of the crust. There is no longer a Straw Hat in the hometown--it closed years ago--but there is still the one in the next town, which coincidentally is where the special gym is. It is the old kind of Straw Hat, with the take-out window on the side. KidThree is very tolerant of my weakness for Straw Hat pizza, and so we have gotten them three of our four visits so far. When we get home, I package up the leftovers, two pieces together, in ziplocs, then reheat them when needed. It reheats beautifully and I get to indulge and indulge my childhood love. I'm just sorry to say that I don't think I'll be able to swing the cost of another one on Friday, our last visit to the gym. Drat this blasted poverty. That will be it for my Straw Hat fix until we next go down to see the folks.
**a little aside: if anyone ever reads this and has the chance to vote for universal health care, please do. This situation we find ourselves in could happen to anyone. One moment in time robs a family member of the health so many of us take for granted and there goes savings, job, home, everything like that, and you too could end up counting out pennies to see if you've found enough to get the gas necessary to take your child to her specialist. KidThree will be independent one day, it will just take a little longer than with the usual able-bodied teen.
Okay, I will stop preaching. Just felt a little compelled there. One moment of being in the wrong place at the wrong time and there went the lives we knew, gone forever.
Today will be a busy day. KidThree has an appt with her psychologist, then two hours later an appt with a specialist--this appt we've been waiting for for three months and desperately need. Then right after that, we have the support group meeting. This is definitely a KidThree-centered week.
Yesterday we got in the mail Disc One and Disc Two of Season Four of The Wire. We watched all three episodes on the first disc. I had to watch the first episode twice to catch all the nuances, as the show is so full of details and so much is established for the season in the first episode. Today after all our appts we will come home to watch the second disc. My mother told me that she and Dad tried to watch The Wire but were unable to make sense of it. I think what they will need is an interpreter to get them through the first couple of episodes, as they don't speak ghetto. Fortunately for them, I have learned fluent ghetto from KidThree. KidOne and KidTwo came with lessons in Spanish, in which I'm now pretty good, and KidThree taught me ghetto. Being a parent is always such an educational experience; we learn as we teach.
Yesterday I started a book called "Artemisia," about the Italian artist Artemisia Gentileschi, which I found browsing the fiction section at the library and am enjoying it immensely. I'd never heard of this artist or of her father Orazio but am captivated by their story. Not to mention blown away by the beauty of Artemisia's paintings. After I finish the book, I'll look for more information on her art--maybe the library will have a book on her paintings or can find such a book for me. The book was in the fiction section because Artemisia's story called to the author for fictionalization. When I stumble on something like this, I frequently get annoyed at the world for keeping from me something as major as the existence of this brilliant artist. It makes me wonder how much else is out there that I would find this fascinating but am totally unaware of.
Terry Pratchett's DiscWorld novels were like that for me. I've always enjoyed a certain amount of science fiction and fantasy but never had much patience for the sort that involved fairies or heaving bosoms or swords of power and so eventually gave up on the genres because I didn't know how to sort through to find my kind of book. Thus I missed DiscWorld. Fortunately for me, SisterD didn't give up and does the wading through for me. Also fortunately for me, she doesn't re-read as much as I do. When she moved last year, she packed up her entire set of DiscWorld novels and shipped them to me. I was enchanted. Made my way through the entire series and enjoyed it so very much. Each time I read another book I would think, "surely he can't top this," and then the next book he would. This is a set of books my father would love. Unfortunately, because of our two moves last year and then the unexpected arrivals of KidFour and KidOne and then KidFour's departure, my books are in such disarray I could never hope to dig out the first couple of DiscWorld novels, at least not right now. KidOne's furniture and belongings depart in another three or four weeks; I'll look for the DiscWorld books then and take the first couple down to Dad to see how he likes them. Mom won't read them, she hates science fiction. Mom is a funny reader. She loves to read and reads many of the same authors I do, but she refuses to re-read anything, ever, and won't read anything if she thinks it couldn't actually happen. She and I have had some conversations about the not re-reading, as I re-read incessantly and with the good books enjoy them more and more and more, but she just won't do it. When I think of all the nuances and references she misses that way, it makes me shake my head. My mother can be a funny person. She is such a wonderful woman, but does have her idiosyncrasies, as do we all.
This morning I got an email alert from the library: Khaled Hosseini's "A Thousand Splendid Suns" is waiting for me. I should have time to stop to get it on the way out of town for KidThree's appointments, then I'll have it to read while she is with her therapist. What a treat!
Time to go do other things now. Tomorrow will be a more peaceful day. At least there is pizza for breakfast.
A
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Tuesday on the Treadmill.
Today it is off to the gym again with KidThree, then home to do laundry. (I do seem to do laundry a lot.) First, one more cup of coffee and a chat with myself here, then off to wake up the Kid, take my shower, get her cleaned up, and hit the road.
I decided not to finish "Crush Depth." The inanity of the writing and the stock characters eventually wore me down. It was plain that the good guys would win, that the maniacal prototypical Aryan would get his comeuppance, and that the 'good German' would also go down with the ship. The woman who got away would come back and the estranged parents & son would reconcile. Truth, justice, and the American way would prevail.
Please, authors, if you are writing for adults, act like it. Make up characters that have more than one dimension; get away from stereotypes; do something unexpected; and for goodness' sake, get me a subordinate clause once in a while. It is so second-grade to read sentences that consist of only subject, verb, object in ten words or less. Over and over again, that starts to sound like Dr. Seuss. And quit making the captains of the ship, literal or figurative, maniacs. I know from experience that the military gives all sorts of psychological screening to folks before they are allowed to become submariners--those lunatic megalomaniacs would never pass the screening.
Okay, enough rant for the day. Right now I am reading "Still Me," by Christopher Reeve. It is wonderful. He is so very clear and articulate about everything that went on with his life and his body and through his mind, and is so open about sharing it all, the good, the bad, and the self-pitying. I recognize so much of what he went through in what we went through with KidThree when she was paralyzed; she'll get the book next to read. Of course she is well aware of his experience and already holds him as an example of how to make the best out of extreme adversity.
Yesterday, after the gym, KidThree asked a question that reminded me to not take for granted things that are so automatic to me but might not be for her. When she was in the standing machine (a machine that puts her into a standing position), she got lightheaded and a little nauseated, then when she was on the treadmill (hanging in a harness, with a trainer moving her feet in a walking motion), she again got sick and was not able to finish the sequence. Both times, the trainers got her horizontal right away and gave her some water, and I was right there for reassurance. I explained to her that her body was not used to pumping blood all the way to her head while she was in a standing position, as she has been sitting or lying down for a year and a half, and she understood. Her question to me later was, could that have killed her. Uh oh! I forgot to add the part on how it all gets fixed right away once she is no longer vertical. I made a little joke, "no, you pass out, fall over, then your blood pressure gets happy," then explained in more detail how it all works. KidThree did not grow up in an educated, medically oriented household the way I did, and so much of what I take for granted is unknown to her. I try to remember to give thorough explanations for most things and she feels free to cut me off when I'm talking too much, but sometimes I do miss where she needs more detail.
I'm not sure what I'll read after "Still Me." I'm in that sort of mood where nothing sounds particularly appealing. Maybe some scientific non-fiction. Hmm.
After the gym yesterday, KidThree and I went to visit my parents. Those visits are both fun and stressful. It is fun to yak with Mom, but Dad is failing steadily, and that is hard to see. We all concentrate on the positive and work to ignore the negative (at least directly with Dad, as it is pointless--we certainly do talk about it amongst ourselves), but it does get wearing. We try to enjoy every moment and always leave on a positive note, just in case.
Now off to watch my dvd on how to care for people with dementia.
A
I decided not to finish "Crush Depth." The inanity of the writing and the stock characters eventually wore me down. It was plain that the good guys would win, that the maniacal prototypical Aryan would get his comeuppance, and that the 'good German' would also go down with the ship. The woman who got away would come back and the estranged parents & son would reconcile. Truth, justice, and the American way would prevail.
Please, authors, if you are writing for adults, act like it. Make up characters that have more than one dimension; get away from stereotypes; do something unexpected; and for goodness' sake, get me a subordinate clause once in a while. It is so second-grade to read sentences that consist of only subject, verb, object in ten words or less. Over and over again, that starts to sound like Dr. Seuss. And quit making the captains of the ship, literal or figurative, maniacs. I know from experience that the military gives all sorts of psychological screening to folks before they are allowed to become submariners--those lunatic megalomaniacs would never pass the screening.
Okay, enough rant for the day. Right now I am reading "Still Me," by Christopher Reeve. It is wonderful. He is so very clear and articulate about everything that went on with his life and his body and through his mind, and is so open about sharing it all, the good, the bad, and the self-pitying. I recognize so much of what he went through in what we went through with KidThree when she was paralyzed; she'll get the book next to read. Of course she is well aware of his experience and already holds him as an example of how to make the best out of extreme adversity.
Yesterday, after the gym, KidThree asked a question that reminded me to not take for granted things that are so automatic to me but might not be for her. When she was in the standing machine (a machine that puts her into a standing position), she got lightheaded and a little nauseated, then when she was on the treadmill (hanging in a harness, with a trainer moving her feet in a walking motion), she again got sick and was not able to finish the sequence. Both times, the trainers got her horizontal right away and gave her some water, and I was right there for reassurance. I explained to her that her body was not used to pumping blood all the way to her head while she was in a standing position, as she has been sitting or lying down for a year and a half, and she understood. Her question to me later was, could that have killed her. Uh oh! I forgot to add the part on how it all gets fixed right away once she is no longer vertical. I made a little joke, "no, you pass out, fall over, then your blood pressure gets happy," then explained in more detail how it all works. KidThree did not grow up in an educated, medically oriented household the way I did, and so much of what I take for granted is unknown to her. I try to remember to give thorough explanations for most things and she feels free to cut me off when I'm talking too much, but sometimes I do miss where she needs more detail.
I'm not sure what I'll read after "Still Me." I'm in that sort of mood where nothing sounds particularly appealing. Maybe some scientific non-fiction. Hmm.
After the gym yesterday, KidThree and I went to visit my parents. Those visits are both fun and stressful. It is fun to yak with Mom, but Dad is failing steadily, and that is hard to see. We all concentrate on the positive and work to ignore the negative (at least directly with Dad, as it is pointless--we certainly do talk about it amongst ourselves), but it does get wearing. We try to enjoy every moment and always leave on a positive note, just in case.
Now off to watch my dvd on how to care for people with dementia.
A
Monday, August 11, 2008
Okay, I Finally Took the Plunge.
Yours truly signed up for match.com! Really, I did. Oh my. Out of circulation since 1982, so let's see how it goes. The impetus was CousinC's wedding announcement. CousinC is a year older than I (and much prettier and sweeter, sigh. . .) and found her fella on match.com. My parents have met him and approve wholeheartedly.
That is the big news for the day.
Yesterday our lovely spell of cool-ish weather broke and we went back to the usual summer heat. Yuck. Oh well, the cool weather was lovely while it lasted.
Yesterday I took KidThree to visit an out-of-town friend of hers. Because of their respective disabilities, I had to go get the friend and then take the pair to a McDonald's, where I sat at a separate table and read while the kids visited. Before leaving town here, I stopped at the library to grab a book to read while waiting on the kids, as nothing at home interested me at the moment (I was at the beginning of a migraine and hard to please). I grabbed a novel about submarine warfare, "Crush Depth," by an author named Joe Buff. I got through the first half and enjoyed it more than I thought I would, as I was rubbing my temple and right eye while reading. The plot is interesting, which makes up for the mostly formulaic characters, so I'll go ahead and finish the book. Being a former sailor (albeit not in submarines), I do enjoy novels with a nautical theme.
Today KidThree and I head back to the gym and then to visit the parents, with whom we will have dinner before heading back home.
And that is all I can think of to say right now. That migraine yesterday was the first I've had in a year or so and I'm still recovering.
A
That is the big news for the day.
Yesterday our lovely spell of cool-ish weather broke and we went back to the usual summer heat. Yuck. Oh well, the cool weather was lovely while it lasted.
Yesterday I took KidThree to visit an out-of-town friend of hers. Because of their respective disabilities, I had to go get the friend and then take the pair to a McDonald's, where I sat at a separate table and read while the kids visited. Before leaving town here, I stopped at the library to grab a book to read while waiting on the kids, as nothing at home interested me at the moment (I was at the beginning of a migraine and hard to please). I grabbed a novel about submarine warfare, "Crush Depth," by an author named Joe Buff. I got through the first half and enjoyed it more than I thought I would, as I was rubbing my temple and right eye while reading. The plot is interesting, which makes up for the mostly formulaic characters, so I'll go ahead and finish the book. Being a former sailor (albeit not in submarines), I do enjoy novels with a nautical theme.
Today KidThree and I head back to the gym and then to visit the parents, with whom we will have dinner before heading back home.
And that is all I can think of to say right now. That migraine yesterday was the first I've had in a year or so and I'm still recovering.
A
Friday, August 8, 2008
A Lovely Morning.
The weather outside is cool and breezy, so I have all the windows open to get as much fresh air inside as possible. It feels so good to feel the movement of air after eight years of an apartment with no air circulation at all.
Laundry day. Seven loads, with two waiting as there weren't enough quarters. Four loads washed, dried, and folded, with three more spinning around in dryers as I type. Laundry is one of those chores I don't mind at all--it doesn't make me dizzy and has a definite beginning, middle, and end. The dirty laundry always reappears, but each load is a completed task in and of itself.
Yesterday I did get a nap after watching BabyJ, then after KidThree and a friend finished yakking up a storm, that friend went home and I took KidThree out for ice cream. We were given coupons for 'buy one, get one free,' so we have been enjoying a bit more ice cream sundaes than we can usually afford. We have one more we particularly want to use before they all expire in ten days.
Today KidThree goes back to the gym for her second of the five sessions. No visiting after today, as it is Friday and the traffic will be worse earlier in the commute. Tomorrow is my Saturday at the senior center, then Sunday KidThree and I will try to get to see 'The Dark Knight.' Such an exciting life we lead these days!
I'm still enjoying the heck out of the biography of John and Jessie Fremont. Being a native Californian, I'd learned a little about John Fremont, and having cousins in Fremont, CA, made me interested in him in particular, but this book is showing me I knew nothing at all about the man. It seems history has not treated him kindly or fairly, and that politicians have been practising plausible deniability for a very long time.
I'm also reading a bit of Sherlock Holmes, as I found a used paperback of those stories and it is more easily portable than the Fremonts' biography. Sherlock Holmes is not my favorite fictional character and I can see why Sir Arthur Conan Doyle got tired of him. Still, he is fun for a while and I do like reading things that have been spun off from those stories. People have gotten really creative with Holmes as their starting point.
And that is it for this morning. Not much going on and not much to talk about. I'll try to get to the library before it closes to get myself a new bunch of books to read and talk about.
A
Laundry day. Seven loads, with two waiting as there weren't enough quarters. Four loads washed, dried, and folded, with three more spinning around in dryers as I type. Laundry is one of those chores I don't mind at all--it doesn't make me dizzy and has a definite beginning, middle, and end. The dirty laundry always reappears, but each load is a completed task in and of itself.
Yesterday I did get a nap after watching BabyJ, then after KidThree and a friend finished yakking up a storm, that friend went home and I took KidThree out for ice cream. We were given coupons for 'buy one, get one free,' so we have been enjoying a bit more ice cream sundaes than we can usually afford. We have one more we particularly want to use before they all expire in ten days.
Today KidThree goes back to the gym for her second of the five sessions. No visiting after today, as it is Friday and the traffic will be worse earlier in the commute. Tomorrow is my Saturday at the senior center, then Sunday KidThree and I will try to get to see 'The Dark Knight.' Such an exciting life we lead these days!
I'm still enjoying the heck out of the biography of John and Jessie Fremont. Being a native Californian, I'd learned a little about John Fremont, and having cousins in Fremont, CA, made me interested in him in particular, but this book is showing me I knew nothing at all about the man. It seems history has not treated him kindly or fairly, and that politicians have been practising plausible deniability for a very long time.
I'm also reading a bit of Sherlock Holmes, as I found a used paperback of those stories and it is more easily portable than the Fremonts' biography. Sherlock Holmes is not my favorite fictional character and I can see why Sir Arthur Conan Doyle got tired of him. Still, he is fun for a while and I do like reading things that have been spun off from those stories. People have gotten really creative with Holmes as their starting point.
And that is it for this morning. Not much going on and not much to talk about. I'll try to get to the library before it closes to get myself a new bunch of books to read and talk about.
A
Thursday, August 7, 2008
The Check Is SO Not In The Mail
Yesterday morning I faxed over to Victim's Comp the letter from KidThree's former pediatrician stating that all our OTC supplies were medically necessary because of KidThree's status as a Victim of a Violent Crime and that said supplies would be necessary for the rest of her life as her condition (paraplegia) is permanent. I wrote a note on the fax cover sheet asking my contact there to give me a call when she got the letter to tell me whether or not it was sufficient to get money pried loose. She obligingly gave me a call and said that the letter was all that she needed, but that now the request would have to be routed to the State Review Board since the cumulative total of OTC items was over $100. When I asked her how long that process would probably take, she estimated a month or two.
The sad thing was, she wasn't kidding. What on earth could possibly be in that process that would take that long? It is such a straightforward claim. KidThree was shot in a crime of which she was an innocent victim. We are cooperating fully with the police and prosecutors. The items for which I'm requesting reimbursement are items specifically purchased for special care of KidThree because of her paraplegia. They are things we never had to purchase prior to her injury and are things that are not used for anything or anyone else, just for KidThree and her personal care. Why oh why oh why does it have to be so complicated? Honest to goodness, it should not be this hard. The program was set up because of the understanding that violent crimes occur without warning and can decimate a family's finances. That is what happened to us. The shooting was out of the blue, unexpected, a fluke, a stray bullet not intended for my girl who just happened to be in the vicinity. Our family finances weren't just decimated, they were obliterated, eradicated, wiped out of existence. My job? Gone. Checking account? Overdrawn as often as not. The details of our claim are all verified, the status of crime victim, KidThree's total lack of anything to do with the crime other than being in the wrong place at the wrong time, our cooperation with police and prosecution. How on earth can a program intended to help us out take months and months to get a reimbursement on verified expenses? I'm going to have to go back to my state representative to ask for help in getting this expedited or I won't see any money until KidThree and I are evicted and living under a bridge, which probably won't be an accessible location.
And now for a cheerier topic: yesterday was KidThree's first day at the special gym. Oh my. What amazing things there are for disabled people and how wonderful are the able-bodied who run them and work with the disabled people. At $95 an hour, it is worth every penny and then some. If I could get Victim's Comp to fund this, I would make the three-hour round trip every single week to get KidThree to that gym. One of the trainers went over paperwork and information with us first, then KidThree worked with her and then another trainer for a total of two hours. They had her doing amazing things, including STANDING UP! One of the trainers got her between parallel bars and braced her knees with his legs and had her STANDING UP! He explained that standing up helps her maintain bone density, keeping her as healthy as possible so that if stem cell research ever does come through for us, she will be a good candidate. KidThree was listening and following instructions like I've never seen her do before. She is now willing to let California Children's Services purchase a special machine for her that will put her into a standing position; she had previously been dead set against that machine and was totally unwilling to listen to reasons it was good for her to stand up. Either enough time has gone by that she is able to listen, or these trainers were able to explain things to her just right, and she listened. Wow. And she looked so beautiful and proud of herself while STANDING UP that I had to go over and give her a kiss and tell her how wonderful she looked STANDING UP. I did see her STANDING UP in rehab, but that was while encased in that machine that looked like a medieval torture device; here she was holding herself up with her arms, with the trainer just providing stability for her legs. The strength and power were all hers. Oh Happy Day!
We went to see my parents after that, as they live only ten minutes from that gym. We had a good visit and set up a dinner date for next week, then drove home. We got hooked on 'The Wire' recently and had a dvd with the last two episodes of Season Three waiting for us in the mail, so we had a good time watching those episodes, then took our tired selves to our beds.
This morning I am watching BabyJ, always a treat as he has about the sunniest disposition of any child I've ever met. We go for walks, go the playground down the street, do 'mountain climbing' on a little hill in the parking lot of the Korean Church, and read books about Thomas the Tank Engine. I do so love spending time with BabyJ.
I'm further into the biography of John and Jessie Fremont and still enjoying it immensely. The politics are so clearly explained and the couple themselves are so interesting to learn about.
Now off to try to wake up a little more to be ready for the day. I do hope I get a nap after watching BabyJ.
A
The sad thing was, she wasn't kidding. What on earth could possibly be in that process that would take that long? It is such a straightforward claim. KidThree was shot in a crime of which she was an innocent victim. We are cooperating fully with the police and prosecutors. The items for which I'm requesting reimbursement are items specifically purchased for special care of KidThree because of her paraplegia. They are things we never had to purchase prior to her injury and are things that are not used for anything or anyone else, just for KidThree and her personal care. Why oh why oh why does it have to be so complicated? Honest to goodness, it should not be this hard. The program was set up because of the understanding that violent crimes occur without warning and can decimate a family's finances. That is what happened to us. The shooting was out of the blue, unexpected, a fluke, a stray bullet not intended for my girl who just happened to be in the vicinity. Our family finances weren't just decimated, they were obliterated, eradicated, wiped out of existence. My job? Gone. Checking account? Overdrawn as often as not. The details of our claim are all verified, the status of crime victim, KidThree's total lack of anything to do with the crime other than being in the wrong place at the wrong time, our cooperation with police and prosecution. How on earth can a program intended to help us out take months and months to get a reimbursement on verified expenses? I'm going to have to go back to my state representative to ask for help in getting this expedited or I won't see any money until KidThree and I are evicted and living under a bridge, which probably won't be an accessible location.
And now for a cheerier topic: yesterday was KidThree's first day at the special gym. Oh my. What amazing things there are for disabled people and how wonderful are the able-bodied who run them and work with the disabled people. At $95 an hour, it is worth every penny and then some. If I could get Victim's Comp to fund this, I would make the three-hour round trip every single week to get KidThree to that gym. One of the trainers went over paperwork and information with us first, then KidThree worked with her and then another trainer for a total of two hours. They had her doing amazing things, including STANDING UP! One of the trainers got her between parallel bars and braced her knees with his legs and had her STANDING UP! He explained that standing up helps her maintain bone density, keeping her as healthy as possible so that if stem cell research ever does come through for us, she will be a good candidate. KidThree was listening and following instructions like I've never seen her do before. She is now willing to let California Children's Services purchase a special machine for her that will put her into a standing position; she had previously been dead set against that machine and was totally unwilling to listen to reasons it was good for her to stand up. Either enough time has gone by that she is able to listen, or these trainers were able to explain things to her just right, and she listened. Wow. And she looked so beautiful and proud of herself while STANDING UP that I had to go over and give her a kiss and tell her how wonderful she looked STANDING UP. I did see her STANDING UP in rehab, but that was while encased in that machine that looked like a medieval torture device; here she was holding herself up with her arms, with the trainer just providing stability for her legs. The strength and power were all hers. Oh Happy Day!
We went to see my parents after that, as they live only ten minutes from that gym. We had a good visit and set up a dinner date for next week, then drove home. We got hooked on 'The Wire' recently and had a dvd with the last two episodes of Season Three waiting for us in the mail, so we had a good time watching those episodes, then took our tired selves to our beds.
This morning I am watching BabyJ, always a treat as he has about the sunniest disposition of any child I've ever met. We go for walks, go the playground down the street, do 'mountain climbing' on a little hill in the parking lot of the Korean Church, and read books about Thomas the Tank Engine. I do so love spending time with BabyJ.
I'm further into the biography of John and Jessie Fremont and still enjoying it immensely. The politics are so clearly explained and the couple themselves are so interesting to learn about.
Now off to try to wake up a little more to be ready for the day. I do hope I get a nap after watching BabyJ.
A
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Who Can Keep Track?
There is so much going on these days, my head is spinning. But first: last night we saw Paris Hilton's response ad to John McCain's campaign ad featuring her. It was about the funniest thing I've seen in ages--who knew Paris Hilton had that in her? I didn't. Oh my, it was funny. Good for you, Paris Hilton! That almost made up for that vile Carl's Jr. ad you did several years back.
Yesterday I went to see KidThree's former pediatrician to get a letter signed, and stayed to visit for half an hour with the pediatrician and her medical assistant, updating them on KidThree's progress and situation. The letter was for Victim's Comp. Victim's Comp is the most byzantine program ever devised by the mind of a committee, and is the bane of my life. They are supposed to reimburse for supplies/needs/care caused directly by violent crime, but every time I deal with them, I run into subtext and small print and exceptions and addenda and exclusions and prohibitions and why didn't you know that ma'am.
This time it was the $100 lifetime limit on OTC supplies UNLESS you send them a letter from a provider verifying that each item is medically necessary, why each item is medically necessary, and how long the victim will require the use of that particular item. Given that we use so much OTC stuff for KidThree's personal care, we go over $100 every month, sometimes in just a week or two. I had been previously told that a letter explaining the use of each item was all that was necessary, so I sent pages and pages of explanations on what each procedure was and what supplies we used during that particular procedure and why we used that particular item and not some other. I guess I just forgot to get a medical degree first. Drat my carelessness.
To make it easier for our wonderful former pediatrician, I wrote up a suitably serious letter in my very best medicalese and even brought a copy for the doctor to keep in her files. She did me one better, though, by having her medical assistant copy my letter onto their letterhead. Three pages of why 'the victim' needs each and every item on that list. Victim's Comp has $1500 of receipts from me that I am awaiting reimbursement for--this morning I fax over the doctor's letter and an insurance denial that I had lying around (rest assured, if you need a particular item because a roughly equivalent item just does not do the trick for your particular problem, insurance will not cover your particular item) and then I just sit and wait to see what my lady over at Victim's Comp can do for us. I hope it involves coughing up money, as I haven't paid the rent this month. Thank goodness for patient landladies who understand our situation and the difficulty of prying tax dollars loose from government clutches.
Today we head south an hour and a half to a special gym for KidThree. They specialize in dealing with SCI patients and will take two weeks (five visits) to develop a personalized workout program specific to KidThree and her needs. Pretty neat. Every SCI patient is different in what muscles they have control over and how much control, etc., so the routines have to be that individualized. At the end of the five visits (two hours each at $95 an hour--thank you Mom and Dad!), KidThree will have a videotaped workout routine to take home with her and use here.
The best news of all for the past week: I am out of hock with the library! No more skulking in the shadows of its hallowed halls, afraid someone might let my name slip when I'm inside their portals, no more using KidOne's card at the automatic checkout machine. I paid the entire fine, including a small fine owed by KidOne and a larger one owed by KidTwo. It was funny to find out that KidOne and KidTwo were still children in the eyes of the library. The wonderful librarian who helped me changed their records to reflect the fact that they were all grown up now and legally responsible for their own forgetfulness and fines. KidOne was quite pleased that the library now recognizes her adult status. KidThree and I left the library each in possession of a new library card and a new record and all my sins officially forgiven. (I owed them a bundle from back when KidThree was hospitalized--three months of riding back and forth to the hospital on the buses and leaving books hither and yon and never, ever remembering to return things on time. Having a kid shot will do that to you.)
I have been a reading fool since KidOne loaned me her card a month or so back. It feels so good! I just finished a book called 'Faith in the Halls of Power,' about the rise of American Evangelicalism in government and industry. It was fascinating. A lot of it I already knew but each time I thought I could set the book aside to return, the author moved to another aspect of the issue and I had to keep reading. I also read Terry Pratchett's latest Discworld novel, 'Making Money,' and thoroughly enjoyed it. I read recently that he has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's, such a horrible diagnosis for anyone.
Yesterday I spent seven hours caring for my lady who has Alzheimer's. We have a wonderful time together. She likes to sit and hold hands and asks me about my siblings and my children. Every visit those subjects are new to her again, so we never run out of things to talk about. Usually she does not show an awareness of the Alzheimer's-ness of her situation but yesterday she did. At one point, she looked directly at me and said, 'I don't understand what is going on,' and another time she stood up, took a few steps, and when I asked her where she was going, she gave me a puzzled look and said she didn't know. That was very sad. I work very hard when with her to keep her happy and relaxed, repeating again and again and again where her husband is and what family member will be home first and that I would never, ever leave her alone and afraid. She is such a sweetheart, and so very funny. I didn't know her before this advanced stage of her disease, so the person I know is the pared-down version. Her kindness and gentleness are so evident still, and her good humor and love of laughter. Yesterday we found a peculiarly shaped rock on our way home from the park and she grinned conspiratorially, "let's throw it at someone's head!" I love to spend time with her and hate it when she gets frightened. I read a book (on KidOne's card!) recently called 'Dancing with Rose,' which gave such a tremendously good example on how to deal with people with Alzheimer's; it reinforced what I am doing with my little lady and that there can still be joy in our interactions.
Right now I am reading a biography of John and Jessie Fremont. I'm not far into it yet but am enjoying it immensely. I've also got waiting a biography of Marcus Garvey and one on modern global history. I'm waiting for John Lescroart's last one still but just finished John Sandford's most recent. I also read David Handler's most recent and discovered that I missed a book, apparently his fifth in the Berger-Mitry series. I think I will not read that one, as apparently the characters broke up in it and I'm happier with their reunited status from Book Six. There is enough sadness in the world that I can avoid that little bit extra.
In the home, KidOne and I are working on the living room, now that the kitchen is finished. Someday this entire little apartment will be all set up just the way I'd like. Goodness only knows when, but someday that will happen.
The trial for KidThree's assailants started two days ago, this a year and a half after the shooting and four continuances and six months since the original trial date. We are on telephone standby but don't know when KidThree will have to go to testify. She is terrified. Several days ago I went into her room and found her curled up on the bed. Paralysis notwithstanding, she had still managed to get herself into fetal position and was hugging her poor legs for dear life. All I can do it give her hugs and kisses and all the reassurance I can that she is doing the right thing and that anyone who wants to retaliate for her testimony would have to go through me to get to her. The poor kid. It is so awful to be a parent when your kids are faced with traumas that you can't take on for them but can only help them to bear.
That is it for this morning. Time to finish my coffee and shower, then get KidThree up and ready for our visit to the gym.
A
Yesterday I went to see KidThree's former pediatrician to get a letter signed, and stayed to visit for half an hour with the pediatrician and her medical assistant, updating them on KidThree's progress and situation. The letter was for Victim's Comp. Victim's Comp is the most byzantine program ever devised by the mind of a committee, and is the bane of my life. They are supposed to reimburse for supplies/needs/care caused directly by violent crime, but every time I deal with them, I run into subtext and small print and exceptions and addenda and exclusions and prohibitions and why didn't you know that ma'am.
This time it was the $100 lifetime limit on OTC supplies UNLESS you send them a letter from a provider verifying that each item is medically necessary, why each item is medically necessary, and how long the victim will require the use of that particular item. Given that we use so much OTC stuff for KidThree's personal care, we go over $100 every month, sometimes in just a week or two. I had been previously told that a letter explaining the use of each item was all that was necessary, so I sent pages and pages of explanations on what each procedure was and what supplies we used during that particular procedure and why we used that particular item and not some other. I guess I just forgot to get a medical degree first. Drat my carelessness.
To make it easier for our wonderful former pediatrician, I wrote up a suitably serious letter in my very best medicalese and even brought a copy for the doctor to keep in her files. She did me one better, though, by having her medical assistant copy my letter onto their letterhead. Three pages of why 'the victim' needs each and every item on that list. Victim's Comp has $1500 of receipts from me that I am awaiting reimbursement for--this morning I fax over the doctor's letter and an insurance denial that I had lying around (rest assured, if you need a particular item because a roughly equivalent item just does not do the trick for your particular problem, insurance will not cover your particular item) and then I just sit and wait to see what my lady over at Victim's Comp can do for us. I hope it involves coughing up money, as I haven't paid the rent this month. Thank goodness for patient landladies who understand our situation and the difficulty of prying tax dollars loose from government clutches.
Today we head south an hour and a half to a special gym for KidThree. They specialize in dealing with SCI patients and will take two weeks (five visits) to develop a personalized workout program specific to KidThree and her needs. Pretty neat. Every SCI patient is different in what muscles they have control over and how much control, etc., so the routines have to be that individualized. At the end of the five visits (two hours each at $95 an hour--thank you Mom and Dad!), KidThree will have a videotaped workout routine to take home with her and use here.
The best news of all for the past week: I am out of hock with the library! No more skulking in the shadows of its hallowed halls, afraid someone might let my name slip when I'm inside their portals, no more using KidOne's card at the automatic checkout machine. I paid the entire fine, including a small fine owed by KidOne and a larger one owed by KidTwo. It was funny to find out that KidOne and KidTwo were still children in the eyes of the library. The wonderful librarian who helped me changed their records to reflect the fact that they were all grown up now and legally responsible for their own forgetfulness and fines. KidOne was quite pleased that the library now recognizes her adult status. KidThree and I left the library each in possession of a new library card and a new record and all my sins officially forgiven. (I owed them a bundle from back when KidThree was hospitalized--three months of riding back and forth to the hospital on the buses and leaving books hither and yon and never, ever remembering to return things on time. Having a kid shot will do that to you.)
I have been a reading fool since KidOne loaned me her card a month or so back. It feels so good! I just finished a book called 'Faith in the Halls of Power,' about the rise of American Evangelicalism in government and industry. It was fascinating. A lot of it I already knew but each time I thought I could set the book aside to return, the author moved to another aspect of the issue and I had to keep reading. I also read Terry Pratchett's latest Discworld novel, 'Making Money,' and thoroughly enjoyed it. I read recently that he has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's, such a horrible diagnosis for anyone.
Yesterday I spent seven hours caring for my lady who has Alzheimer's. We have a wonderful time together. She likes to sit and hold hands and asks me about my siblings and my children. Every visit those subjects are new to her again, so we never run out of things to talk about. Usually she does not show an awareness of the Alzheimer's-ness of her situation but yesterday she did. At one point, she looked directly at me and said, 'I don't understand what is going on,' and another time she stood up, took a few steps, and when I asked her where she was going, she gave me a puzzled look and said she didn't know. That was very sad. I work very hard when with her to keep her happy and relaxed, repeating again and again and again where her husband is and what family member will be home first and that I would never, ever leave her alone and afraid. She is such a sweetheart, and so very funny. I didn't know her before this advanced stage of her disease, so the person I know is the pared-down version. Her kindness and gentleness are so evident still, and her good humor and love of laughter. Yesterday we found a peculiarly shaped rock on our way home from the park and she grinned conspiratorially, "let's throw it at someone's head!" I love to spend time with her and hate it when she gets frightened. I read a book (on KidOne's card!) recently called 'Dancing with Rose,' which gave such a tremendously good example on how to deal with people with Alzheimer's; it reinforced what I am doing with my little lady and that there can still be joy in our interactions.
Right now I am reading a biography of John and Jessie Fremont. I'm not far into it yet but am enjoying it immensely. I've also got waiting a biography of Marcus Garvey and one on modern global history. I'm waiting for John Lescroart's last one still but just finished John Sandford's most recent. I also read David Handler's most recent and discovered that I missed a book, apparently his fifth in the Berger-Mitry series. I think I will not read that one, as apparently the characters broke up in it and I'm happier with their reunited status from Book Six. There is enough sadness in the world that I can avoid that little bit extra.
In the home, KidOne and I are working on the living room, now that the kitchen is finished. Someday this entire little apartment will be all set up just the way I'd like. Goodness only knows when, but someday that will happen.
The trial for KidThree's assailants started two days ago, this a year and a half after the shooting and four continuances and six months since the original trial date. We are on telephone standby but don't know when KidThree will have to go to testify. She is terrified. Several days ago I went into her room and found her curled up on the bed. Paralysis notwithstanding, she had still managed to get herself into fetal position and was hugging her poor legs for dear life. All I can do it give her hugs and kisses and all the reassurance I can that she is doing the right thing and that anyone who wants to retaliate for her testimony would have to go through me to get to her. The poor kid. It is so awful to be a parent when your kids are faced with traumas that you can't take on for them but can only help them to bear.
That is it for this morning. Time to finish my coffee and shower, then get KidThree up and ready for our visit to the gym.
A
Monday, August 4, 2008
Finally!
Back online, at home, at long last. Three and a half hours with Steve the Computer Guy and this computer is good to go. Or at least as good to go as it can get, given that it was a floor model given to us with no software--long story, the gist of which is that this is not the best machine ever assembled and then it had a tough time before arriving in our home, where it continued to receive a certain amount of ill treatment.
But, I'm online, so that is enough for now. KidTwo's computer went home with Steve the Computer Guy, where he will dump the hard disk on to an external drive, re-do the operating stuff, and then put the hard drive's contents back on in a special folder for KidTwo; I will then have the rest of the computer to use for myself. And when I can scrape up enough money to buy an external hard drive myself, I will put KidTwo's entire hard drive stuff on it and mail that to her. The computer itself is too heavy to ship to her, much as she would like me to and much as I love to please her.
KidThree and I are off to Ciocolat for some well-deserved dessert. More tomorrow.
A
But, I'm online, so that is enough for now. KidTwo's computer went home with Steve the Computer Guy, where he will dump the hard disk on to an external drive, re-do the operating stuff, and then put the hard drive's contents back on in a special folder for KidTwo; I will then have the rest of the computer to use for myself. And when I can scrape up enough money to buy an external hard drive myself, I will put KidTwo's entire hard drive stuff on it and mail that to her. The computer itself is too heavy to ship to her, much as she would like me to and much as I love to please her.
KidThree and I are off to Ciocolat for some well-deserved dessert. More tomorrow.
A
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